March 31, 2005

Some years ago, Bishop Vaughn was at a family’s home for dinner. He noticed that the children could hardly keep still at the table. Finally, they excitedly said, “Can we show him yet? Can we show the bishop the angel?” The mom, looking a bit uncomfortable, told them, “Not now, maybe after dessert.”

When dessert was finished, the kids burst forth with another round of “Can we show him now? Please can we show him the angel?” The mother and father caught eyes and said, “OK, we can show him.” The kids all but knocked their chairs over getting away from the table and ran down the hall into a room at the end. Bishop Vaughn, wondering what all this meant, followed the parents.

Just before they entered the room, the mother turned toward the bishop and said, “I hope it’s OK, but I told the children that their brother is an angel sent from heaven in order to teach us how to love. And that when we have learned our lesson well, God will take him back home to heaven.” The bishop was still a bit befuddled by all this until he entered the room. There he saw the most profoundly physically and mentally challenged child he had ever seen. The child could not even feed himself. Then, the bishop understood.

These parents had recognized the power of God to transform even this most tragic of situations into something beautiful. They had faith that He could take their Good Friday and make it into an Easter Sunday. Rather than as a burden, they saw this child as an opportunity for their own growth as human beings. We grow in love to the extent that we pour ourselves out selflessly for others. On the other hand, we diminish as human beings the more we hold onto our own wills at the expense of others. What kind of people would these parents be if they had decided simply to not feed their child? Oh, there are those who rationalize that, “It would be better for the child…” But this is a false compassion, based on a vague and ever-moving standard of one’s “quality of life.” Life itself is a gift of inestimable value regardless of the challenges one faces within it.

This mother’s insight into theology is worthy of note for all of us – especially as our country is gripped with the events around Terri Schiavo, and as we ponder how to deal with our other most vulnerable brothers and sisters. There is no explaining why something so bad happened to Terri 15 years ago. It strikes at the mystery of why God allows suffering. What we now do with such a situation, however, will determine who we are as individuals and as a people. God wants to transform each and every cross we may bear into an opportunity for our own growth in love and for all those around us as well. It is a way we can participate in the transformation of the world. If God allows us the gift of an “angel” with a disability, then we have a choice of who we want to be. We can become their Simon of Cyrene – or their executioner.

Br. John Anthony Boughton, CFR
Local Vicar, St. Leopold Friary, Yonkers, New York

(Editor’s Note: This reflection by Br. John Anthony Boughton was written hours prior to the death of Terry Schiavo. May her soul rest in peace and may she soon become an intercessor for us and especially for those in most need of God’s mercy. Our Lady of Guadalupe, Mother of all life, pray for us!)
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